About the Author

John Kelly Mione is a mid-fifties baby boomer born in Dayton, Ohio, the only son among the four children of John and Peggy Mione. At age nine, two life-changing experiences happened to him within months of each other.

First, he lost his identity, long before identity theft was even a twinkle in a crook’s eye.

Balding fifth grade teacher Mr. Mollica one day asked a geography question, and 15 hands flew in the air hoping to be called on for the answer. He called on “John,” and two other kids blurted out “Montpelier!” before the chosen John even parted his lips. Still another “John” quickly protested, “He was calling on me!” “No, it was me!” John was sure it was him all along, as did John, John, and of course, John.

Before their eyes, more of Mr. Mollica’s hair fell out and floated down onto the desk.

He made all four stand at their desks, and state their middle names. There was going to be one less John in this class in a matter of seconds. The author was the last one called. Other names offered up were all comical – along the lines of Abercrombie, Humperdink and  Newsbickle. Unbelievable.

He’s been Kelly ever since.

Shortly thereafter, the Disney TV movie “Atta Girl Kelly” aired, attracting brutal teasing from his classmates. To assuage his bruised ego and keep him from hiding in his room, his dad dragged him from under the bed and put a cut-down three iron in his hand. He’d signed  Joh . . er, Kelly up for some golf lessons, the first one in about 15 minutes.

He was hooked on that first day, after connecting with a couple of shots that traveled what seemed like miles – at least 40 yards. He’s called himself a golfer ever since.

The only extended break he ever took was while his two soccer-star kids were growing up and there just wasn’t time. They’re grown now, and despite the aches and pains that accompany the years, he’s back into golf in a big way – big driver, big fees, big scores. He’ll never see the four handicap he carried for awhile as a teen, but still breaks 80 now and then – mostly then.

But the one thing that hasn’t changed over the years is the number of people who, despite their professed love for the game, continue to demonstrate a painful disregard for the rules of golf etiquette. He hopes to spread the gospel of good etiquette and play many more rounds on beautiful golf courses before he passes on to that great links in the sky.

WHAT THEY'RE SAYING

“A must-read for any beginning golfer . . . and a good review for the experienced golfer who may have forgotten how to speed up play.”  

 -- Dave Wirth,
News/Sports Anchor,
WTSP-TV, Tampa, FL

“Doofus Proof Golf covers all the essentials of golf etiquette in a well-organized, easy-to-read manner. It’s perfect for players new to the game."   

-- Bruz Fellenz, Publisher,
Tampa Bay Golfer's Guide

“Exhibiting proper etiquette on the course is the best way to insure everyone enjoys their game to its fullest . . . this would be a great book for clubs to give to new members." 

-- Jim Fortson,
Golf Marketing Consultant,
Valrico, FL

“We need this kind of book ... I'd like to get everyone who wants to play our course to read this book first."

-- Matt Coté, Head Professional,
Fox Hollow Golf Club, Trinity, FL